SINGALONG
TIME - The Great Numbers
'Bewitched, Bothered and Bewildered'
'Rule Britannia' - Fool Britannia?
'Twinkle, Twinkle, Little Star' Chamber
NB Items starting with !
are recent additions or updates.
'Bewitched,
Bothered and Bewildered'
Dr Azikiwe's attitudes to the British are bewildering. Plural 'attitudes' because Zik clearly could not decide whether he loved the British or hated them. As a nationalist leader, he had a public persona to project and keep alive, and he would feel it necessary, as someone opposed to colonial rule, to damn the colonial oppressors of his people. Zik had a problem here because the British had a public persona to maintain too, so they were for the most part very nice to Zik and never put him in jail. Behind his back they said he was an old fraud, a poseur, an unscrupulous, conceited and quarrelsome troublemaker. It must be remembered too that the British read his mail, tapped his telephone and planted informers amongst his contacts, so they would know what his 'real' views of the British were.
Zik had his intelligence service, too, in the largely
Igbo-staffed British administration. Zik's problem was that the British
administration was probably as relaxed and kind and sensible as any colonial
regime in history. It was not the fault of the men on the spot if resources
were scarce. These officials came to love
Zik was a great joiner too, and seemingly enjoyed hospitality and being made a fuss of. Probably all the reports I noted are false. Surely Zik could not have supported Freemasonry, Moral Rearmament, the Catholic Church, the Communist Party and such a diverse group of disparate organisations. It seems Zik wanted to be accepted as a VIP and leader of his people. He sought respectability. Zik was not cut out to become a guerrilla fighter in the jungle.
The British were decent people. However, they had not built a great empire by being soft. They could be tough and ruthless, if opposed. It was sensible of Nigerians to accept British rule. Rebellion could have had bloody consequences. Neither do we know of all the excesses of British rule. The files are closed or destroyed. The British were nice guys when possible and good behaviour was rewarded, but colonial rule is not a children's tea party. We were an occupying force, with an army - though small - of occupation. Our intelligence service - a synonym for the administration, for all Britishers had a political and intelligence role - was everywhere and superb. The administration too was very efficient and cheap to run. The British were for the most part respected, liked and rarely unpopular.
It is little wonder that the British confused Zik. Neither
were they too serious about absolute power, and a gradual handover began many
years before final independence on 1 October 1960. Zik was not the only one who
was confused - many of the British were a bit bewildered too. Few Northern
administrators were best pleased at the prospect of handing over power to the
Southern tribal leaders, Zik and Awolowo. It might have been all right if
So why did we come to rig
"It was necessary." We were only obeying orders.
The first part was absolutely categorical. Those were the Governor General's
words to me in his office in 1960 when I asked him why we had rigged the
elections. He implied the bit about obeying orders. He told me I was the only
senior British officer to refuse to take part. He also said that I had been
mistreated, which he openly admitted, not by him but by the
Actually - and this was not an intellectual response but a surge of feeling - when he spoke indirectly of us obeying orders, he got to me somehow and I wanted to go along with him and do whatever he said. What he wanted was my word. My word never to speak to anyone of how we had rigged the elections. Maybe he did not know he had got to me. I have a strong sense of duty and believe... and suddenly I really do not know how he got to me. Anyway, he soon lost me because he switched to a very threatening stance. I do not respond to bullying, and I realised that for all his considerable charm and attractiveness, he had an icy-cold, amoral streak. What the balance of good and evil in him was, I do not know. He certainly had a most attractive personality when he switched it on. Robertson was, I think, extremely intelligent and he had a touch of warmth and sympathy. As I say, he was getting to me. I am not good with men close up in intimate conversation, but I felt he had some understanding of where I was. It was quite a shock when I saw the cold steel. He went on to say he would destroy me if necessary. I was more than frightened. I looked into his eyes. His expression had changed totally. His eyes were dead. He made me feel he could wring my neck and return to signing his papers without giving a second thought to my body lying on his carpet.
Did I say that Zik was bewitched, bothered and bewildered? Zik was not the only one.
25 March 1992
'Rule
Britannia' Fool Britannia?
All too often the desired balance in foreign affairs is not
between the despised idealism and the favoured realism, but between honesty and
criminality. In fact the favoured excuse for criminality is necessity. There is
nothing new in all this. For centuries
Attlee's Government espoused honesty and decency, and started the Cold War and set up a secret terrorist force that practised state violence abroad for fifty years. However, Professor Charmley tells us that Attlee was indeed an idealist, but that the trade union bully Bevin got his way and overruled Attlee.
Wilson's bad behaviour in Nigeria, which killed two
million, was his own doing for he admitted that he was almost isolated in his
own Cabinet, but he got his murderous way. Paradox abounds and a case could be
made that British policy is to have no policy at all. Given the mentality of
the Oxbridge types, who run the Civil Service and particularly the Foreign
Office, this is hardly surprising. They have no experience of anything but
believe that they have a divine right to rule. One does not need to think up
insults for these unfortunates; telling the truth about them is devastating enough.
Fool Britannia, Cruel
21 April 1998
Twinkle,
Twinkle, Little Star Chamber...
The original Star Chamber was supposedly abolished in 1641, but as befits a tribunal appointed by the Crown and totally secret and severe in its judgements, it merely went underground and out of view. The security of the State is the only business of the Star Chamber, whatever name it goes by, whether it functions as an adjunct of the Joint Intelligence Committee, or Privy Council, and its clientele or victims do not even have to make an appearance. In wartime, spies are executed in secret and traitors disappear, and the enemy is quietly assassinated. Much the same happens, but less frequently, in peacetime, but in the Cold War, although it was business as usual, more secrecy was called for.
The sentence I got was unemployment for the rest of my life, which included, of course, the Civil Service by whom I was employed at that time. Any attempt to reveal the state secrets to which I was privy would be met by sufficient force to silence me. Some plea-bargaining was offered. In exchange for my word of honour never to reveal what I knew, I would have a brilliant foreign service career (I had made a brilliant start, it was conceded), rapid promotion and honours of my choice. Having declined these seductive offers, I was warned by a secret service agent to flee Africa before they killed me, and by a CIA agent to make a quick get-away and, when in London, by the use of a password, to make contact with the CIA's Station Chief in London.
The Governor General who passed judgement on me had clearly
been fully briefed by his masters, both as to whether to pass judgement, and
the exact sentence to be applied. To persuade me, as he said, of how much
trouble I was in, he frankly admitted the total truth of the fact that the
British Government was shamelessly rigging
"I'm a civil servant," I said desperately.
"Senior Colonial Service officers are the same as Army officers, and you know the penalty for disobeying orders on active service..." he answered crisply. He was threatening, oh so quietly, as if discussing whether to have tea or coffee, to have me killed. "Think of your wife and children," he added compassionately.
As my existing entitlement under the Widows' and Orphans' Pension scheme had been suspended, as he well knew, it did seem he had overlooked nothing.
He emphasised that I was on my own, though in truth three of us had protested.
"You are the only senior officer in the whole service engaged in this operation who has defied me and refused to obey my orders..."
His reference to the Army reminded me of the strategies employed to induce me to transfer to the Army at high rank. I had suspected a trap and now I knew that it had been one. His final threat was to the point.
"If you refuse to give your word, means will be found to silence you," he said...
This was the most powerful man in the largest and most
important and richest nation in black
If there is an appeal from the Star Chamber, I have not yet heard of one. I was silenced, and I was never employed again. Thereafter I was too busy trying to survive, to stay alive, to be much of a threat to public order.
29 April l994
`
Yes. We Have No Bananas... (Popular song: Silver and Cohn, 1923)
If
a) Does the Government rig elections?
b) Is the Press strictly controlled?
c) Is official corruption tolerated?
d) Is a civil servant denied redress against injustice?
e) Is criminal Government action tolerated?
f) Are civil servants punished if they protest against criminal action by Government?
g) Are the secret services used to initiate and cover up criminal covert Government action?
Here we have the seven deadly sins of open and decent
Government and, as I can demonstrate, the British Government is guilty on all
seven charges. Albion has become
We really do need a new national anthem now that we are the mainstay of the European Community. A proud lyric on the lines of,
"Confound their Politics, Frustrate their knavish Tricks..."
Perhaps.
20 June 1992